Garden Thoughts

I was in my garden a couple of evenings ago picking Okra.  It's about the only thing left in the garden now, except for weeds and a few cherry tomatoes.  It always makes me a little sad.

It was a pretty good garden this year, although we have certainly had better ones in the past.  I just didn't spend enough time in it weeding and watering and generally taking care of it.

The Bible tells us that you reap what you sow and that certainly is true, but it is also very true that you reap a lot of things you don't necessarily sow as well.  An uncared for garden will quickly fill up with more varieties of weeds than I can count without taking off my shoes and socks.

There is a good feeling in the spring, when you get out in the cool fresh air and till up the soil and plant corn and bean seeds and put tomato and pepper plants in the ground, but it isn't easy in the heart of summer to get down on your hands and knees and pull weeds and kill squash bugs. 

Did I mention that I hate squash bugs?

Life is like a garden in many ways.  The laws of sowing and reaping apply.  But while people think of sowing as a one time event, what we reap is never dependent on just one day of effort.  Certainly you can mess things up in a single day, but what we reap is really dependent on multiple days of effort.

I think about it most as I raise my children.  For, children are a lot more than the scrambled genetic material of their parents.  They are human beings with minds, hearts, and desires, good points and bad points.  Raising them cannot be done in a single day or even a couple of days.

I pray for my children a lot and for myself as I touch their lives.  It is a fearful thing to have little lives entrusted into your care and to realize that someday they (and their spouses) will reap what you have sowed.

It is better to wake up each day, making a commitment to sow blessing and good, than to wake up one day in the fall angry because all your garden is producing is Okra and Weeds.

Perfect Timing

"But Dad," Elliot wailed.  "I don't want to!"

"I don't really care," I, the hard hearted father, declared.  "I want you to sit on the potty for a little while."

Elliot began again.  "But Dad, I need a book to look at while I'm on the potty."

"That's fine," I told him.  "Just choose one quickly."

He poked around for awhile, getting nowhere particularly fast.  "Elliot," I said.  "I'll choose one for you in just a second, if you don't choose one."

"But Dad," he said (a lot of his statements seem to start with "But Dad").  "I need a book that gets done when I'm done pooping.

Eventually, he chose a book that satisfied his criteria -- The Biggest Bear, as I recall.  With that in hand, he went away relatively quietly.

They say that timing is everything.  Comedians who forget the punch lines to their jokes or, just say them at the wrong moment are not particularly funny.  There is a perfect time to pick corn and beans and squash and sweet potatoes.  And I suppose there is a perfect time to finish a book.

Jesus was both the Master of Time and Timing.  Throughout the Gospel of John, He told His disciples that "My time is not yet come."  Then, near the end of His ministry, He told His disciples that "The hour has come." 

Jesus understood His purpose in this world and was ready to meet it when the time was right.  The crucifixion and the suffering and the glory to follow were upon Him and He would not put them off, even though He could.

In our lives today, Jesus continues to work.  Sometimes it may seem like things are moving too quickly and at others, too slowly, but in the fullness of time, His plans for us will come to pass.

Certainly, we can be certain that there will be suffering and hard ship.  But there will be glory too, to come in His time.

One thing is certain about Jesus, His timing is perfect.

Past Performance and Future Returns

"Past performance does not predict future returns."

This statement, or something like it appears on all stock broker advertisements.  Just because the stock market, or real estate market, or bond market has gone up six percent a year for the last eight years doesn't mean that this won't be the year that it tumbles twenty percent.  Even more importantly, even intelligent money managers will have years where their investments don't hit as well as in the past.

There is no easy prediction of what the market will do.  We tend to think that whatever happened last week is what will continue to happen for the next several months, but there certainly is no guarantee that that is true.  Those who play the market heavily are as likely to lose a bunch of money as to make a bundle.

There are many other areas of life that are unpredictable.  However as I think about God, about how faithful He has been to order the chaos in my life and bring good out of bad situations, it begs the question:  "Will His past faithfulness continue into the future or, is He like the stock market, sometimes up and sometimes down?"

If there is one thing the Bible makes clear, it is the fact that God does not change.  Theologians call this the Immutability of God, but whatever word you use, one thing is clear, God is dependable.

That is a real blessing, for people change and not always for the better, but God is the same yesterday, today and forever.

No one really knows for sure if the stock market will be up or down next week, but we can be sure of God.  The things he has done in the past are just a little sample of the wonders He will do in the future.  God doesn't have bad days.  He has said "I will never leave you or forsake you," and we can depend on that.

With God, past performance does predict future faithfulness.

That's a blessing we can't fully grasp.

Watermelons and Waiting

I'm going to go get some dirt in my bucket!"  Elliot said loudly, holding up a bright orange bucket.

"Where are you going to get dirt?"  Elaine asked him.

"In the garden," he said, which seemed safe enough.  The garden is a good place to get dirt from right now, because about all there is in it is dirt.  Well, dirt, okra, and weeds -- but certainly there is more than enough dirt there to fill up a little child-sized bucket.

Scarcely two minutes had passed when Elliot came hurrying down the hill, yelling proudly and holding something green aloft.  "Elliot David Waldron!"  Elaine said.  "Did you pick that?"

"Yes, Mom," Elliot was exuberant.  "It's a watermelon.  We can eat it."  He was right that it was a watermelon, but it wasn't such a watermelon as would ever grace the shelves of any grocery store.  It was tiny, scarcely bigger than a cantelope and when you tapped on it, it gave no satisfying hollow thud, instead it sounded pretty solid.

Of course, there is no explaining the concept of waiting to a four year old.  Within five minutes of leaving your driveway on a trip, he is ready to be there already.  When he hears about a vacation coming, he is ready to leave the following morning.  And when he sees a watermelon in the garden, he picks it immediately.

Some of this has to do with time sense.  Four year olds just don't have the same sense of time adults have.  Age certainly will let you leave unripe watermelons longer in the garden, but it doesn't necessarily bring patience.  Certainly as we get older, we get quieter while we wait, but that doesn't mean that we have a peaceful spirits in those times of pausing in daily existence.

In those moments when we are ready for the next thing to happen and nothing at all is happening, Patience walks hand in hand with Trust.  For, we can be patient only as we trust that someone greater is in charge and that He will bring things and people into our lives that we need, at exactly the right moment.

Otherwise, we may be tempted to pick the watermelons of life long before they are ripe.

That's far from a tasty proposition.

Peace and Quiet

"I'm a silent 'e,' Elliot," Vince said.  "What letter are you?"

We were out in the garden working, or at least Anna and I were.  Vince and Elliot were having an odd little conversation of their own.

"I'm a silent 'L,' Elliot replied.

"There's no such thing as a silent 'L,'" Vince told him.

"Yes there is," Elliot told him.  "I have one in my name!"

It is odd to me that my children both thought they were silent letters, because they are far from silent in every day life. 

I have thought that it would be nice to have twin girls and name them "Peace" and "Quiet," because that would be the easiest way to obtain both peace and quiet in my home.

However, I know that there will come a day when our children are gone more than they are home.  There will be days when the conversations at the dinner table will have a lot less cackling of laughter and fewer interruptions and a lot more stillness.

I don't know how much I will miss all of the non-funny comments followed by hysterical giggles, but I certainly will miss the fun of a family growing up together.

It seem to me that we tend to long for that which we do not have.  I would enjoy my children as they are now -- giggles and all -- rather than long for peace and quiet that I don't have.

I would have joy in each season of life, be they noisy, or quiet.

Crazy Eyes

It came to pass one day, as the time of school drew near, that my beautiful wife and beloved children did wend their way unto the office of a Doctor of Optometry. 

And there, they found out news, but not all of it was good.

Later that same day, my oldest son, Vince did approach me.  "Dad," he said.  "I have a Crazy Eye that doesn't see well," and so saying, he squinched up his left eye and he stared out at me from his Crazy Eye.

"I suppose that is why you need glasses," I told him.

Vince nodded his head sagely.  "Yes, Dad, glasses are for people with Crazy Eyes."

Perhaps my son is right.  Maybe it is those with Crazy Eyes who need lenses between them and the rest of the world to help them focus, but I think it is more than that.

It matters little if one has an astigmatism like Vince, or is near sighted, as I have been told my daughter Anna is, the question is whether or not you can see the world around you clearly.  If not, then a little help is just what the Doctor of Optometry orders.

The book of Proverbs says that "Where there is no vision, the people perish."  While it would be tempting to think of this as talking about a community without glasses running stop signs and cutting of digits due to lack of sight, the issue is a lot more important than that.

Vision speaks of seeing the future.

Where do you want to be in ten years?  Now, tell me what you are doing to get there.  Each decision you make is taking you farther from, or closer to your goals.  It takes a special kind of glasses to be able to focus on your own life and your own actions and evaluate where they are taking you.

So it is, that the most important vision is not the kind that optometrists can fix with lenses.  The problem is not people with Crazy Eyes, it is people who do not see themselves as God sees them and who will live in chaos as a result.

Unlocking Doors

"I can't open the door," Vince told me.

"Why not?"  I asked him.

"Because it is locked."

I went to the door of the boy's bedroom.  It certainly was locked.  It wasn't supposed to be locked, particularly with no one inside, but it was.

"Vince, did you lock it?"  I asked him.

"No," he answered.

"Did you lock it Elliot?"  I asked my younger son.

"Yes, Dad,"  Elliot said.  "I didn't want Vince to go in there."  Elliot is a little prone to doing things that aren't exactly well thought out.

I went and got something to pick the lock.  As I went to insert it into the door knob, I found that it wouldn't go.  A very small nail had been inserted into the knob and completely blocked me from getting to the lock mechanism.

"Elliot, did you put this nail in here?"

"I was trying to unlock the door," he said as a way of explanation.

I was pretty frustrated at this point.  It was time for the boys to go to sleep and I couldn't get into their room even to get their pajamas.

I tried to move the nail, or pull it out -- unsuccessfully.  The door's hinges were on the other side so that wasn't a way into the room, either.  "I'm sorry boys," I told them.  "I can't get the door open.  I'm going to put you to sleep downstairs."

They were both a little upset when I left them in the bed to return to working on the door.  I finally managed to slip a straight pin past the nail head and wiggled it till the door clicked open.  I took the knob off and extracted the nail, while Elaine went down to bring the boys up to get changed and sleep in their own beds.

As they were coming up the stairs, Vince told her:  "I was praying that God would unlock the door."

The night before we had sung a song with words by Fanny Crosby:  'Prayer is the Key.'  The chorus says: 

 

Prayer is the key, the only key,

to heaven's unfailing store.

Faith is the hand that guides our own,

but prayer unlocks the door.

 

I had explained to my children how doors are metaphorical.  God opens ways for us when we don't what to do, or where to go next.

 

But Vince knew that God unlocks literal doors.

 

With his child's faith, he reached out and asked for help.  In that moment he reminded me that no task is too big or to small for God.

 

For God hears even the smallest voice speaking to Him from an unfamiliar bed and unlocks his door.

Splint or Crutches?

"Dad," Vince asked me.  "Which do you like better, your splint or, your crutches?"

It wasn't an easy question to answer. 

I was lying on a bed in a hotel room with my leg propped up and a stirrup splint strapped to my swollen ankle and crutches beside the bed.  I wasn't grateful for anything in this picture.  In fact, I was upset at how a sprained ankle was going to spoil a family reunion for me.

As I battled self pity, I remembered a verse from Phillipians.  "Rejoice in the Lord always..."  I wondered how that applied to my situation.  What was the good thing that I could rejoice about?

It has been my tendency to try to figure out the good things that come about because of the suffering I experience.  The traffic accident I avoided because I was running late.  The lessons that I learned because of the difficulties I faced.

But the command is not to try figure out how having a sprained ankle will help me grow, or develop character or, benefit me in some tangible way.  The command is to rejoice.

I never did figure out a reason why I sprained my ankle playing Ultimate Frisbee or, why the elevators weren't working in our hotel and I had to maneuver my way up and down eight flights of steps with an ankle the size of a softball, but that doesn't matter.

My son Vince was right.  I need to have joy in the presence of pain and splints and crutches -- not because I like them, but because I serve a great God.

He's enough for every situation I face.

A Square Meal

"I want a hamburger, Dad," Elliot said.

"How do you ask?"  I asked him.

"May I please have a hamburger?"  Elliot said, very appropriately.

I studied his plate for a second.  He had already had a hot dog, green beans, and some potato chips.  I cut a hamburger in half and put one half on plate.

"Dad," he wailed.  "You cut it in half.  I wanted the whole thing!"

"You wouldn't have eaten the whole thing," I told him.  "If you are still hungry when you finish that, you can have the other half."

"But... but... Dad, I like square food and this is a rectangle!" 

I stifled a smile.  He was certainly correct that the burger had been square initially and cutting it in half made it rectangular,  but this was a reason I had never heard before.  I'm sure that Elliot thought that he wanted a whole burger, but it had nothing to do with the shape of the meat sitting in his plate.

In the same way, perhaps, there are many times that I want something and I work really hard to come up with reasons, good reasons why I want it.  And yet, if I am honest with myself, there is only one reason:  I want it.

As I think about it, it is really important that we are honest with ourselves about our motivations to get or, do things.  There is nothing more confusing than when we manufacture fake reasons to do things we just want to do.

In the end, rationalizations aren't worth much.  No more, really, than the difference in taste between square and rectangular food.

Dealing with Grief

 

Daniel was sitting in a the chair beside the door when I entered the exam room, waiting patiently for me.  We shook hands and then I sat down.

"How have you been doing?"  I asked him.

"Oh, I guess about the same as ever," he told me.

"Is that good or bad?"  I asked him.

"I think it's good," he responded.  Daniel was seventy-eight years old and only on one prescriptions medication.  He was in for visit for an annual physical and to get a refill on his medication.

I pressed a different tab on my computer and his vitals popped up.  "You've lost some weight," I said.  "Is everything OK?"

Daniel hesitated and then tears spilled out of his eyes.  "I... I just don't have as much of an appetite since Mary died.  You knew that Mary died in March?"  I had known, but I hadn't remembered it when I came into the room.  Now I did.

"I'm sorry," I said.  "I'm sure you're missing her terribly.  How are you dealing with Mary's death?"

"It's hard.  I miss her so much.  I was doing something last night and I realized it was time for us to go to bed and I started to say: 'Mary, let's go to bed,'  when it hit me that she wasn't there.  That seems to happen a lot."

These are the sort of conversations that medical school doesn't prepare you for.  What do you say to a man who has lost the love of his life -- someone he had shared everything with for the past fifty years?

Everything sounds trite and hollow. 

"She's in a better place." 

"You'll see her again some day." 

"Time will heal your wounds."

While these words may be true, they don't meet the need of the moment.  I don't know what such a loss is like, I can only imagine.  "Daniel," I said.  "I don't think there's anything that can fill the hole in your life, or take away your grief.  Time may make the wounds less fresh, but sometimes there will be things that remind you of her and bring it all back to you.  That's also an indication of how much you loved each other."

I asked him if it was OK if we prayed together and he said yes.  That's what we did.

I am no grief counselor, but it seems to me that the most import thing to do in this situation is to acknowledge the reality of the loss and the depth of the grief.  Maybe for a moment we can share in someone else's sorrow, even if we don't totally understand.

I know that burdens which cannot be borne alone can be shouldered together. 

In the darkest situations, only Jesus can shine a light that will pierce the darkness.

Traveling for the Sake of Traveling

“Classic Travel Stories.” Perhaps it sounds like an interesting book. Certainly, a book that includes an assemblage of true stories from a variety of journeys in numerous different places is sure to have excitement on every page.

This is exactly what I thought when I picked up the book and started wading through it. The stories ranged from Xenephon’s journey from Persia to Greece, to Robert Fallon Scott’s disastrous attempt on the South Pole. All were very interesting indeed, yet I found something distinctly lacking.

You see, I found that the stories of the journeys themselves did not assuage my desire to know what these various individuals did upon reaching their goals. The journey is really only a means to an end.

I know this from my own life. I do not enjoy traveling, I enjoy getting places. I hate the hours that are often necessary to reach a given destination. If it were possible to teleport from one location to another and skip the travels completely, I would gladly take advantage of such an option.

Unfortunately, in life, many people believe that the goal is not nearly as important as the journey itself. Yet, a journey without a goal; travels without an intended end are worthless.

The writer of Hebrews made it clear in chapter 12, that our focus is not on the race, but on the finish line. "Therefore, ...let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eye on Jesus..." Somehow, in spite of all the obstacles, we must arrive in glory with Him.

Life is a journey; one made either aimlessly or in a goal directed fashion. It is only as we fix our eyes on Jesus and make Him the focal point of our travels that our goal of eternity with Him will be realized.

What's Facebook good for?

An awful lot of people use Facebook these days.  According to Google, it has 1.4 billion monthly users.  Now, of course, some of those aren't real people, but still, there are at least a hundred or two folks who use the social media site regularly.

All this begs the question:  "What is Facebook good for?"

I suppose it is good for selling things and for keeping track of people who you haven't seen in a long time.  It also seems to be a good place for finding low calorie recipes and even for drooling over the occasional super-high calorie dessert recipe as well.

Most of all, I think many people use Facebook to reinforce their own strongly held beliefs and to solicit encouragement to do things they were planning to do anyway.

Unfortunately, I see biased individuals posting links to web sites with similar biases and dubious credibility.  The internet is a wonderfully large place where, however unusual my views, I can definitely find a couple of others who hold similar beliefs.

This leads me to thing that Facebook is useless for -- changing someone else's mind.  People who log onto Facebook with a strong opinion are likely to sign off with that opinion held even more strongly -- even if someone calls them a name, or attacks them personally.

I look at these arguments and wish that love would prevail.  I see the anger and desire that kindness would be the rule, rather than the exception in internet interactions.

The cause of Christ will not be furthered by yelling at people, but by loving them where they are and praying that they will accept Him.

For, when Jesus enters a life, He has a way of turning it upside down in a way that Facebook never can.

Good News, Bad News, and Hope

There are a lot of doctor jokes out there.  Many of the ones I have heard are "good news - bad news" jokes.

A doctor comes out to his patient after surgery and tells him:  "I have some good news and bad news."

"What's the bad news, Doc?"

"We cut off the wrong leg in surgery."

"That's terrible.  What's the good news?"

"It looks like your other leg is getting better."

These jokes always bother me a little because of the almost gleeful way in which doctors dispense the most depressing information.  Of course, they are just jokes, but I know how hard it is to share bad test results and how hard I work in these moments not to steal hope away.

It is in these dark-as-midnight moments that people need a little light.  It is never a joke that lifts their spirits, for jokes lose their funniness in these events, but hope.  Somehow, I have to convey that I will not give up and that I will do whatever I can to help them through this time.

Most of all, I turn to prayer.

For, even when medical science holds little hope and when every moment feels like another good bye, there is One who offers light in the darkness, One who promises that we will not have to cross Jordan alone, if we are His.

When I have only bad news and worse news to impart, Jesus holds out hope.  That's just what this dark world needs most.